Who’s calling?


Prior to Mom’s diagnoses of AD, we wondered if she merely had a hearing problem because she kept asking us to repeat what we’d said. LOUDER.

We’d raise our voices then whisper behind her back that maybe we should get her hearing checked. I have a dear friend who is an audiologist so it would be an easy sell.

So I thought.

Throughout the years, mom would brag that she was a stubborn Norwegian. (That she is.) She dug in her heels and in her sweet voice, firmly informed us that she didn’t need a hearing aid and wouldn’t wear one if we got one for her.

Since the hearing aid wasn’t happening, neither was her comprehension and ability to follow conversations.

We weren’t thinking of AD back then.


Recently, she was having some dental issues but kept claiming that she didn’t feel any pain. However, while at the dentist, my sister heard her utter a few “Ow’s.” So, we knew she really was experiencing pain despite her insistence she wasn’t.

Now I am wondering if when we were first concerned about her hearing, that perhaps she didn’t remember that she wasn’t able to key into discussions.

Ouch on us for not being more observant. Or more persistent. Or more proactive.

Now when I call her, I often have to repeat my name and I don’t know if it’s because she can’t hear me or because she doesn’t recognize my voice any more. Regardless, it’s another step backwards.

Today’s poem:

Do you have an ouch moment with your LO? Let’s poem.


“Who’s Calling, Please?”

Used to be when I called, she’d recognize my voice,
even though I sounded like my sister then she’d
say my name like it belonged upon her lips.

Can Atacan

Used to be she’d remember that I had called her.

Used to be she’d call me.

Used to be she didn’t ask, “Who?”


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